Non Sum Qualis Eram
by allivra
Summary: Ariana Noxum was a Marauder. Unofficially, of couse. Fifth year contained good grades, good friends, and good food with few upsets. She was living life to the fullest until when, at the end of the year, she was told some bad news which changed everything.
1. Chapter 1

Ariana hugged her mother. "Goodbye, Mum."

Her mother pushed her back a bit and looked her up and down. "Your shirt's untucked," she noted. "And you may want to put your tie around your neck instead of your head."

Ariana smiled and laughed. "You were going around like this not two days ago!"

Nikola smirked at her daughter. "Just making sure they would fit. It would be a pain for you to not have anything to wear."

_  
Nikola pranced around the house in Ariana's school uniform._

_"You know, Mum, you could go in my place. No one would be able to tell the difference." Indeed, Ariana's young mother was ofter mistaken as her sister or evern as her twin. They often borrowed each other's clothes since they were around the same size. Nikola would raid Ariana's closet when she wanted something casual and Ariana would do likewise when she needed to dress up._

_"I'm too blonde," her mother laughed. "Those guys you hang out with would figure out. They seem the clever sort."_

_Ariana snorted. "The Marauders, you mean? I can see where you could get that idea from Remus, but the others aren't."_

_"Don't be too harsh on them," Nikola warned. "It's hard to come by good friends these days."_

_Ariana shrugged this off. "No worries, they'll always be there for me and I'll always be there for them. And if anything does happen, I'll still have you."_

_This made Nikola smile and she asked, "What do you want for lunch, dear?"_

_"Eh, nothing much. I'm not too hungry. Perhaps a bit of toast."_

_"A bit of toast it is then!" Nikola left for the kitchen, leaving Ariana alone in the living room. She quietly walked around, looking at the pictures on the walls. They mostly consisted of her and her mother at different places they had traveled to, one or two of Nikola when she was at school, and a few of Ariana when she was small. The reason there wasn't much of a variety of people in the pictures was because Ariana and her mother usually kept to themselves. Sure, they'd travel a lot, but they never made good friends to keep in touch with. There was also no other family in Ariana's life. Her mother was pretty much disowned by her parents when she broke the 'Pureblood Rules' by being sorted into Gryffindor when she went to Hogwarts. And Ariana had no idea who her father was; her mother would refuse to talk about him._

_Nikola came back into the room with two plates of toast. "Here you go!"_

_Ariana took a plate before looking at Nikola strangely. "Why is my tie around your head?"_

_Nikola grinned and shrugged sitting down on the couch. "It makes a rather good headband. Why? Jealous?"_

_Ariana laughed._

"You just wanted to relive your glory days," Ariana teased her mother. She paused as she heard someone call her name. "Well, I've got to go, Mum. School awaits. See you for Christmas!"

"Don't forget to study for your O.W.L.s!" Nikola shouted to her as she went to catch up with her friends.

"Will do! Ariana shouted over her shoulder before running into someone. "Oomph!"

"Why if it isn't little Ari!"

"Shut up, Sirius," Ariana groaned as she got back up. "I'm not _that_ much shorter than you!"

"Oh, but you are. And you're much lighter, too." With this Sirius Black picked her up and threw her over his shoulder.

"Sirius! Put me down!" Ariana demanded, pounding him on the back.

"Not until you apologize," Sirius muttered as he tried to figure out how to carry both of their trunks without putting her down.

"Apologize? For what!"

"Well, for one thing, you didn't come to James's party the other week. And then , when I do see you again, it's you running into me." Sirius had decided to just levitate the trunks behind him. "Hey, is that your mom?"

Ariana sighed as Sirius took her back over to where her mother was standing. "Okay, Sirius, I'm sorry. You can put me down now."

"Nooo, I think I like you like this." Ariana rolled her eyes. "Ah, Mrs. Noxum! I must say you look lovely."

Ariana rolled her eyes again and hit Sirius on the back. "She's not a Mrs!" she hissed.

Nikola heard and smiled. "Hello Sirius. It's nice to see you again. I trust you're doing well?"

"I'm excellent, as usual. And yourself?"

"Excuse me," Ariana interrupted, trying to twist around to face them, which was a bit difficult, as Sirius hadn't put her down yet. "This is a very interesting conversation but the train won't wait for you to finish. Come on, let's go!"

"Well, goodbye then, Sirius, Ariana. I do hope you'll come to out Christmas party over the holidays," Nikola said.

"Will do, Mrs- Ariana's Mum! Now, please excuse us, we have a train to catch."

"Bye Mum!" Ariana called as they left.

The two friends go on the train. More than a few people stared at them; Ariana waved at them.

They entered a compartment that held a messy haired boy and a small, pudgy boy.

"Hello Sirius and… is that Ariana?" the messy haired boy asked.

"Hi James. Yes, it's me. Sirius won't put me down! Where's Remus?"

"He's at the Prefect meeting," the small boy, Peter, answered.

"Here, you take her, mate," Sirius said, dropping Ariana on James ignoring, her squeak. "So, our little bookworm as a Prefect now?"

The train stared, the sudden movement forward throwing Ariana on the floor. The boys looked at her, amused.

"Don't say anything," she muttered, glaring at them.

Sirius laughed as he helped her up before sitting down. "Graceful as ever, Ari."

"Shut up." Ariana took a seat next to James and leaned against him. "So, how was your guys' summer?"

The boys all shrugged. James answered, "They all came over to my house for a couple of weeks."

"And you didn't invite _me?_" Ariana asked, pretending to be offended.

Peter spoke up, "We did send you an owl."

Ariana thought. "Ooooooh, that must've been what we heard before we went to-" She was interrupted by the opening of the compartment door. A tall, sandy-haired boy stood there. Ariana noted the fresh scars on his face. "Remmie!" she shouted, patted the spot beside her. "How's our favourite prefect?"

"Yeah, what benefits do we get?" asked Sirius.

"We?" answered Remus, taking the seat next to Ariana. "I do believe that I am the prefect and the benefits are just for me."

"Aw, come on, mate! We're the Marauders! One for all and all for one!" James complained.

"You won't give us detentions, will you?" Peter asked.

Remus smiled slightly. "Of course I won't. And prefects don't get too many benefits. There's a bathroom just for us, which I've heard is really nice. And we get to stay out past curfew, but that's just when we're patrolling. And it's not like you guys obey _that_ rule."

"That's all?" said Ariana. "Just a big bathroom? All I can say is better you than me, mate."

James moved and took a seat next to Sirius. They started planning and finding ways to use Remus's prefect abilities to their advantages. Peter listened in intently but Ariana rolled her eyes and rested her head on Remus's shoulder.

"So," she said. "How was the other night? You look awful. Well, _you_ don't. The scars look a bit painful."

Remus shrugged, trying to look nonchalant. "It wasn't too bad."

Ariana felt terrible for her werewolf friend and started to grow angry. "It's not fair!" she exclaimed. "You don't deserve all this junk. You're a better person than most, why do you have to go through this?"

Remus shrugged again. "It's life, Ari. We play the roles we're given the best we can."

"See?" She threw her arms into the air. "Look how well you deal with it! I wouldn't be able to handle being a werewolf. You, my friend, are my rolemodel."

Remus smirked. "Does that mean you won't wait to do your homework until last minute?"

"Psh," she replied. "Like I'd ever do something as crazy as that."

They continued their conversation before the snack lady arrived.

"Oi, James! You paying this year?" Ariana asked, interrupting his and Sirus's plotting.

"Huh? Oh yeah!" He pulled out a bag of galleons and bought most of the contents of the snack cart before it left.

"Thanks, mate!" Ariana said as she was tossed a couple chocolate frogs. "It's Sirius's turn next year, right?" Sirius nodded. She continued, "Good. And I get 7th year."

They ate in silence for a while. Suddenly some teenagers, with green and silver ties showing from under their black robes, opened the door.

Ariana swalled the food in her mouth and said, "Bugger off."

The black haired girl in the front wrinkled her nose in disgust of being addressed by her. "Don't talk to me, mudblood."

Ariana stiffened while her friends took out their wands. "I'm not a mudblood, thank you, and I'll talk to you if I want to, which I don't, which is why I told you to leave, Black."

"Ah, yes, that's right. You're not a mudblood," Bellatrix Black said, pretending to have thought of something. "You're a bastard, aren't you?" She smirked as Ariana gripped her wand tightly before continuing. "How old was your mother when she had you? Seventeen? Sixteen?"

Ariana exploded. "Don't you talk about my mum!" She sent several curses at the Slytherin girl, who had her own wand pointed at her. Sirius, who was the closest to the door, quickly pushed Bellatrix and her fellow Slytherins out of the compartment and locked the door.

"Sorry about that," he apologized. "She was probably looking to verbally abuse me. Don't listen to anything my cousin said."

Ariana lowered her arm and realized she was standing. She shakily sat back down and started to mutter to herself about all the ways she could kill Bellatrix.

"Well, Marauders, our first target has been chosen," James announced to the group.


	2. Chapter 2

The rest of the train ride went by uneventfully. Ariana grew quiet after half an hour of muttering and fell asleep on Remus while he read. James and Sirius went through the plan again, perfecting the prank. Peter continued to eat Chocolate Frogs and listen to James and Sirius, adding an addition or two to the plan, which was usually greeted with approval.

When the train arrived at the school, Remus woke Ariana and all five of them got off the train together and looked for a carriage to share.

"There's one over there," Sirius pointed and the group looked toward the mentioned carriage.

"It's not completely empty," Ariana noted, disappointed. "See? There's a redhead in there. We wouldn't all be able to fit."

James did a double take. "That's Lily! I'm going to go say hi!" He took off.

Remus sighed. "Who'll babysit him this time?"

"I might as well. I doubt Lily would want to be trapped with James and another one of you guys," Ariana replied.

"Hey! She'd love to be surrounded by manly men like James and I!" Sirius argued.

Ariana snorted as she went after James and called back, "You and James? Manly men? Hah!"

Sirius growled while Remus and Peter laughed.

Ariana jumped into Lily's carriage right before it started off toward the castle. James was on his knees and Lily looked deeply annoyed.

Ariana took a seat and told James to sit. "You don't want to upset the nice girl, now do you?"

James punched her on the arm and muttered as he got up, "Sirius is the dog, not me."

"Sorry about him, Lily. We let him off his leash for a minute and he runs away from us," she joked.

Lily glared at her. "Just keep him away from me. I have no idea how you can stand him."

"Practice." Ariana looked out the window, eager to see the castle where she went to school. "So, ready for the O.W.L.s?" she asked, trying to start a nice conversation.

"No," Lily replied, seeming a bit worried. "These tests determine what classes we take next year which determines our N.E.W.T.s which determines what jobs we get which determines the rest of out lives!" Lily had to stop to take a calming breath. "All extra time I end up withe will be spent studying."

"If you ever need a study buddy, just ask. I'm always free." Ariana kicked James and Lily glared at him.

"If it turns out I need a, as you put it, 'study buddy,' which I won't, I wouldn't ask you, Potter," she coldly replied. "I'd ask someone who actually has a brain and could study."

"Might want to check in with Remus then," Ariana said absentmindedly, still looking out the window. James glared at her but she continued, still not thinking. "Of course, then James would probably kill him. Metaphorically speaking, of course. Ooo! Look! There it is!" As Hogwarts came into view, the three of them looked out the windows to watch it approach.

As the carriage stopped, Lily quickly jumped out. James went to follow her but Ariana had grabbed hold of his arm.

"Let go!" he said, trying to jerk it out of her grasp. She counted to five quietly to give Lily a head start before she loosened her grip on James, allowing him to pull free. "Aw, now look! She's gone!"

"You really should leave her alone, mate. Stalking her won't win you points in her book," Ariana warned him as she looked for the others.

Suddenly someone tapped her shoulder, causing her to jump and turn around. Two red-haired boys stood behind her, both grinning.

"Gideon! Fabian! Don't do that! You're going to give me a heart-attack!"

"What's a—"

"Heart-attack?" The twins asked.

"It's sort of like when your heart stops all of a sudden. Happens to muggles a lot," she explained, walking into the school. "So how's your sister?"

"Molly?"

"She's fine."

"Her cooking is wonderful—"

"As always. We babysat—"

"A couple of times."

Ariana laughed at her sixth year friends. "Has she learned better than to leave her children alone with you yet?"

"Hey!"

"We are very trustworthy!"

Ariana snorted. "I'm just glad you're on our side of chaos-making." They parted when they reached the Gryffindor table as Ariana went to take a seat by the Marauders.

As she sat down next to Peter, she noticed James staring at Lily, Remus reading, Sirius trying to be a manly man, and Peter messing around with his silverware while waiting to eat.

"You guys are so boring without me," she said, stealing Peter's spoon.

"You are the light of our lives," Remus replied, not looking up.

"And don't you forget it!" Ariana put the spoons back to back and started to tap them, making noise. Peter quickly caught on, stole Sirius's and James's spoons, both of whom didn't notice, being too busy and all, and played along.

The noise snapped James out of his daydreaming. "What're you doing?" he asked, confused.

"We're starting a band!" Peter announced.

James grabbed two forks, stabbed Sirius, and tried to join in. "Ow, that hurt!" Sirius complained before taking in what his friends were doing. He watched for a while, amused, before grabbing two knives and banging them together.

Remus was ignoring them, still reading. "Come on, Remus!" Ariana told him. "You can sing!"

"No, thank you."

"Aw, don't be a spoilsport!"

"Someone has to."

"Come on! You have a lovely voice."

"No. Everyone's watching."

"Then entertain them!"

"I'm not going to."

"If you don't, Sirius and James will start to sing," she warned him.

Remus sighed and put his book down. "But I don't know of anything to sing!" he said, desperately still holding out.

"How about 'God Rest Ye Merry Hippogryphs.'"

"That's a Christmas carol!"

"So?"

"Fine." Remus gave in and started singing while his friends kept up a rather badly done rhythm.

They received many strange looks from surrounding students, who grew quiet to listen. Pretty soon the whole Great Hall was listening, or at least silent. No one paid attention as the new first years entered and lined up in front of the Teachers' table. When the carol ended, everyone except the Slytherins clapped. Dumbledore then stood. "Thank you Marauders—"

"And me!" shouted Ariana, who wasn't officially a member of the boys' group.

"And Miss Noxum," Dumbledore continued as if uninterrupted. "For Christmas music a season early. Now we will move on as the winter season officially comes closer." Filch, a middle-age man who kept the school clean and got on the students' nerves, brought out a stool which held an old black wizard's hat and set it in front of the line of the little first years.

"I wasn't that short," Ariana muttered quietly, giving Peter his spoon back as the hat burst into song.

"No, you still are," Sirius joked, earning a glare from her. Remus shushed them so he could listen to the rest of the song without having to put up with annoying muttering. Ariana rolled her eyes but started quietly poking Peter instead of talking. This vexed Peter because he couldn't complain verbally, as that ran the risk of being scolded by Remus. He decided to poke Ariana back, starting a poke war. Sirius thought it looked like fun so he poked James, in hope of starting their own poke war. James, however, had gone back to staring at Lily after the carol had ended, ignoring everything else, including Sirius.

At long last the Sorting Hat's song finished, the first years were sorted, and Dumbledore made the necessary before-feast speech. This year it consisted of, "Goowaz, melin, arvayla!"

The food appeared and everyone started stuffing their faces. Ariana filled the first year's plate, who had unwisely taken the empty seat next to her, while piling things on her own. "Eat up. Best food ever." The small girl watched, too nervous to say anything but relieved enough to be obedient and eat what was put in front of her.

Sirius paused eating to smirk at Ariana. She noticed and asked, glancing suspiciously at him, "What?"

"You're mothering her," Sirius told her, completely casual except for the huge smirk on his face.

"I am not!" Ariana replied hotly, turning away from the first year, trying to convince Sirius that she wasn't mothering the little one.

"Liar." Sirius went back to eating.

"I'm not!" she exclaimed.

"Mhm." Sirius remained unconvinced as Ariana started to eat her own food.

* * *

_A/N: Sorry that this took such a long time to get out. I wrote it ages ago and planned to post it weeks ago but then, all of a sudden, my life strangely became busy. Terribly sorry you had such a long wait. Please enjoy! Reviewing is always appreciated, by the way._


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